How to make people listen to you, and how to make people accept your message … Part 2

How long have you been battling with the question of “how to make people listen to you”?

Do you struggle with the question of “how to make people accept your message”?

Do you get angry and frustrated when people reject your message?

Do you use the frontal attack as religious militants do?
Market street scene
The frontal attack is combative.

It attacks the listener in the guise of providing information, and triggers a fight response from the listener. It is aggressive in approach and invites same in response. 

It is the method militants use. It is not peaceful, and has no touch of love. It is brutal and does not consider the feelings and rights of others.

Never use the frontal attack; use the reverse method

Explain the benefits of what you are offering. Make the listener see how he or she will benefit. Do not force the listener. Let him or her decide; let him or her choose willingly.  People want to choose what they want, and what they think will benefit them.

The Samaritan woman Jesus met by the well had lived a life of a whore; she had lived with five different people. At the time Jesus met her, she was living with a sixth man, (John 4:17-18). She needed spiritual deliverance.
However, Jesus knew that the existing enmity between the Jews and the Samaritans could make it difficult for her to listen to Him. He, therefore, used the reverse method. He asked her for water. When she reminded Jesus that Jews and Samaritans did not talk to each other, Jesus ignored the remark, and rather stated her spiritual need.
Jesus told her,

“If you knew the gift of God, and who it is who is saying to you, ‘Please give me a drink,’ you would have been the one to ask him, and he would have given you living water.” (International Standard Version)

Jesus used ‘water’ to get the woman’s attention. Water was her need at that time. She wondered how Jesus would give her  living water when He had no bucket to draw water; besides, moments ago He had asked her for water to drink. Jesus was using a strategy to engage her to talk back so He could explain to her the spiritual gift He had for her. If Jesus had started by telling her He wanted to give her a gift, she would have ignored Him.

When she retorted, Jesus ignored her sarcasm and rather emphasized on her spiritual need. She became interested in the special water that could “become a fountain of water springing up into everlasting life.” (John 4:14)
He was offering the woman eternal life by using what she valued at the time -‘water’. He got her undivided attention. She was no more thinking about the enmity between Jews and Samaritans. She was now willing to receive from a Jew.
She said,

“Sir, give me this water that I may not thirst, nor come here to draw water.” (John 4:15)

Jesus now had to make her confess her life of sin. Again, He refrained from using the frontal method. He did not tell her, “You must confess your sin before I can give you this water.” That would have provoked her. She would have called other Samaritans to come and see a Jew who had the audacity to come to the city of Samaritans and insult a Samaritan. Angry Samaritans would have come out to lynch that Jew.
He told her to go and bring her husband, though He knew she had no husband. The woman on her own volition confessed that she had no husband. By her confession she  gave Jesus the opportunity to remind her the number of men she had lived with.

That was a powerful revelation

She wondered, “How can this man know my secret life? Is He a prophet?” She answered back, “Sir, I perceive that You are a prophet.” She proceeded to talk about worship and the disagreement between Jews and Samaritans, providing Jesus the opportunity to teach her.
After listening to Jesus expound on worship and spirituality, and telling her He was the Messiah, she became convinced. She left her water pot, went her way into the city, and told other Samaritans about the stranger who could be the Christ; her testimony drew the people to Jesus.

People will listen to you if you articulate your views convincingly
Do not use force as the Boko Haram, Al-Shabaab, ISIS, Al-Qaeda, and other religious militants are doing
Aftermath of Boko Haram Islamic militants attack and destruction of a village and a Christian church in northern Nigeria
Aftermath of Boko Haram Islamic militant attack and destruction of a village and a Christian church in northern Nigeria

 

  • Do not attack people when they do not readily respond to your message
  • Show them the beauty of your cause, not the ugliness and hatred of your cause
  • Patiently discuss how the listener stands to gain when he or she accepts what you are offering.

(Read “Murder and rape in God’s name… God’s Executioners on the loose.”)

The Almighty God, the all Powerful One, does not compel people. Why should you? He says, “Come now, and let us reason together…” (Isaiah 1:18).